Murder? Messy. PS5? Spotless. ‘Crime Scene Cleaner’ Mops Up the Scene Today.

Niels Gys
Jun 14, 2025
1 min read

If you've ever looked at a puddle of blood and thought, "That could use a little elbow grease," congratulations—you’re a sicko. And today is your day. Crime Scene Cleaner, the world’s most hygienic crime-adjacent simulator, has scrubbed its way onto PS5 like bleach on a brain hemorrhage.

Released today with all the fanfare of a forensic janitor at a mafia funeral, this game lets you live out your wildest post-homicide fantasies—minus the prison time. Your job? Erase all traces of mayhem before the cops connect the dots. Think of it as PowerWash Simulator’s unhinged twin who knows where the bodies are buried—because he buried them.

You’re not the killer. You’re not the hero. You’re the guy with a bucket, some lies, and just enough moral flexibility to vacuum a tooth out of a shag carpet.

A dimly lit, modern kitchen splattered with blood and broken dishes. A “TidyClean” vacuum is aimed at the mess. Footprints trail across the scene. — *When dinner parties go wrong, and your mop becomes a co-conspirator.*

Features Include:

Blood. So much blood. And none of it yours… yet.
Brain bits behind the microwave.
Dead eyes staring at you while you mop around them.
A suspicious amount of bleach and jazz music.
The creeping suspicion that you’re being watched. (Spoiler: You are.)

Whether you're hoovering up shell casings, painting over arterial spray, or shoving limbs into a suitcase like it’s carry-on luggage, Crime Scene Cleaner is the perfect game for anyone who’s ever yelled at a true crime doc, “Pfft, amateurs.”

So suit up, glove up, and get ready to clean like your fake alibi depends on it. Because in this game, it probably does.

https://youtu.be/TdFeQultVDA?si=LX9C0gXr-k4sM8jG

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About the Editor

I'm Niels Gys, founder and editor of CRIMENET GAZETTE. I write about crime, heist, villain, and horror games because somebody has to separate genuine criminal masterpieces from games that couldn't organize a successful mugging.

Outside the website, I'm the frontman of JETBLACK SMILE, a Belgian rock 'n' roll band that sounds like bad decisions played through loud guitars. Turns out writing about chaos, criminals, and morally questionable life choices isn't all that different from writing songs.

I started CRIMENET because too much gaming coverage feels afraid to have an opinion. Reviews become press releases, every game is "solid," and somehow everyone leaves happy except the reader.

Not here.

CRIMENET covers crime, heist, villain, and horror games, alongside the occasional film or series that earns a place in the criminal underworld. Not the heroic kind. The kind where you rob banks, build empires, betray your crew, or become the monster everyone else is trying to survive.

I don't do review scores. The internet already has enough people arguing whether a game deserves a 72 instead of a 71, like they're negotiating a hostage release over a single percentage point. I'd rather tell you what the game actually feels like to play and whether it's worth your time.

Every article is built on research, evidence, and an unhealthy intolerance for mediocre game design.

Strong opinions are welcome. Invented facts are not.

Think less "trusted reviewer."

More "your inside man in the digital underworld."

I'm not here to save the world.

I'm here to tell you which crimes are worth committing. 🤘

THIS WEEK
IN CRIME.

Weekly briefings on crime games, villains, heists, industry disasters, and digital chaos.

No corporate fluff. No fake hype. Just the underworld report.

THIS WEEK
IN CRIME.

Weekly briefings on crime games, villains, heists, industry disasters, and digital chaos.

No corporate fluff. No fake hype. Just the underworld report.

Features Include:

Comments

About the Editor

THIS WEEK IN CRIME.

THIS WEEK IN CRIME.

THIS WEEK
IN CRIME.

THIS WEEK
IN CRIME.