Progen T20 Review – GTA's Apex Getaway Car for Heisters
- Niels Gys
- May 24, 2025
- 4 min read
Progen T20 Review – by Niels Gys (As seen racing out of a Union Depository vault with a sack of diamonds and a grin wider than the spoiler)
TL;DR
The Progen T20 is the ultimate heist getaway car—blisteringly fast, razor-sharp handling, and sexy enough to make a vault door blush. It’s the ride of choice for stylish criminals who prefer their escapes loud, flaming, and wrapped in carbon fiber. Chaos? Guaranteed. Cops? Left crying.
Criminet Gazette Rating: 93/100
Perfect if you want to rob the world and look damn good doing it. Avoid if you're into subtlety or surviving car chases quietly.
There are two types of people in this world: the kind who hear a car’s turbo whine and think, “That’s loud,” and the kind who hear it and climax. If you’re the second kind, congratulations—you’ve just found your new favourite toy: the Progen T20.
This isn’t just a car. It’s a hyperactive, carbon-fibre fever dream designed by someone who looked at a McLaren P1 and said, “What if it could also teleport?” Because driving the T20 doesn’t feel like driving. It feels like being flung at the horizon by the hand of God, who’s running late for his parole hearing.
Looks That Could Kill (and Probably Have)
The T20 looks like it was sculpted in a wind tunnel by a team of over-caffeinated cocaine enthusiasts. Every curve says “aerodynamics,” and every vent whispers “I do crimes.” You could park it outside a billionaire’s yacht party and no one would question it—until you peel out, run over the valet, and launch off a pier doing 120.
And that active spoiler? It’s not a spoiler. It’s a statement. It deploys when you brake hard enough to rearrange your organs, just to remind everyone behind you that they’re peasants.
Speed: Yes.
Top speed? 122.25 mph. Not bad, you might think. But in GTA physics, that’s 122 mph of pure unfiltered velocity injected straight into your eyeballs. Hit the gas and you’ll be airborne faster than the plot of Fast & Furious 10.
The acceleration is so savage that your brain will try to evacuate your skull. One moment you’re at a red light. The next, you’ve reached the future.
Handling: Telepathic.
Ever driven a go-kart through a hurricane while strapped to a jet engine? That’s the T20. It doesn’t just corner—it grips reality and bends it to your will. And thanks to its all-wheel drive, you can take a hairpin at 100 and still have enough grip left over to insult the laws of physics on your way out.
In a chase, it's a ballet dancer in a room full of drunk rhinos. Precise, elegant, and far too expensive for what you’re about to do with it.
Customization: Build-A-Bastard
Want to paint it blood red and slap a skirt on the size of a dinner table? Go ahead. Want to black it out like your soul and name it “Daddy’s Credit Card”? No one's stopping you. It’s got vents, scoops, splitters, and exhausts coming out of orifices the designers didn’t know existed.
The T20 is the vehicular equivalent of a Bond villain in a tuxedo—charming, lethal, and almost definitely illegal.
Heist Rating: Stupidly Ideal
As a getaway car, it’s perfect. Cops can’t catch you. Civilians can’t see you. Helicopters try and give chase, then politely explode out of respect. It’s the car you take when you know the job’s going loud and you’re leaving with heat on your tail and 3 stars blinking like judgmental fairy lights.
I once used it to escape from six police cruisers, two choppers, a tank, and a lad named Barry with a pipe wrench. I was home for dinner.
Final Verdict:
The Progen T20 is not a car. It’s a war crime with headlights. It’s what you drive when subtlety is dead and buried under a pile of gold bullion and shell casings.
Would I recommend it? Of course. It’s fast. It’s stylish. It’s got more grip than your ex clinging to the past. And it makes you feel like the villain in your own Hollywood blockbuster—which, let’s be honest, is exactly what we all want.
So get in. Start the engine. Laugh maniacally. And drive like you just robbed the world.
Crimenet Gazette Rating (CGR): 93/100
It doesn’t just flee the scene—it bullies the scene, insults its mother, and vanishes in a cloud of burning rubber and police disappointment.
CGR Breakdown:
Villain Charisma – 19/20
The T20 doesn't whisper "run"—it screams "you'll never catch me, copper" with the confidence of a Bond villain who already booby-trapped your helicopter. It's sleek, smug, and sexy enough to seduce the vault codes out of Fort Knox.
Heist Utility – 18/20
It’s like if a Swiss army knife had an engine and a personal vendetta. Speed, control, agility—this thing maneuvers like it's being puppeteered by Satan’s own pit crew. You could reverse through a laser grid and still look cool.
Chaos Quotient – 20/20
Step on the gas and reality bends. Civilians scatter, cops weep, and helicopters spiral into fiery therapy bills. The only thing louder than the engine is the chaos it leaves in its wake. If God had a car, He’d have a restraining order against the T20.
Aesthetic & Atmosphere – 18/20
It looks like the final boss in a racing game. Glossy, low, and mean enough to make your reflection flinch. Add a neon underglow and you’ve got Blade Runner meets The Italian Job on meth.
Rootability of Evil – 18/20
This isn't a car you drive. It’s a car you become. Every time you step inside, you lose a little more morality—and gain a lot more felony charges. You root for this car the way people root for Loki: it’s bad, it knows it, and it looks better than you doing it.
Next time on "Driving While Armed": I test if the Kuruma can be driven entirely on two wheels while shooting out the window at a pursuing Buzzard. Spoiler: yes.
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